Flow of emotions

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We need to understand the world around us, let it be work, business or private life.
When we don’t, we get frustrated, irritated, puzzled and try to gain understanding as soon as possible.
In best case we ask. Ask for clarification, a different explanation, something we can relate to more.
When not asking then we do the work ourselves. We might do some kind of research by reading up on it or we try to find some answers/sense in ourselves.

Modern art though is something different.
We might, but we don’t need to understand the artist.
In my experience we are allowed and actually encouraged to take our own understanding of it.
A painting, a sculpture, a piece of music or a ballet.

Last week I had the chance to attend a modern ballet performance in a prestigious European Opera house.
Honestly, I had (now I do, read about it afterwards) no idea what the choreographer wanted to say.
All I knew is that an array of emotions was running through me while watching the show, and since!

The thirty some dancers on stage were simply amazing.
At certain scenes I was close to be fully convinced they are not even humans but aliens, as the moves were extraordinary.
Unimaginable for a ‘normal’ human to think it be possible to do.

Through the whole evening emotions were coming. One after the other, the next conflicting the previous one and I didn’t mind it, I didn’t want to stop them coming, nor was I fighting any of it.

And the best part, I believe, is exactly this.
One is allowed to have any and all emotions, one can have their own ‘interpretation’ of the art piece and is nobody’s business.
You can choose to share it, but there is no obligation for it what so ever and need not to ‘defend’ your understanding in case of any different perception from anyone.

When it comes to modern art, what counts is your experience.
Whether it is inspiring, fun, eye opening, even triggering in some ways, it is all enriching you and you must fit no rules, no expectations to take it in in your own ways.

Just as it is with life, with relationships.
Your emotions are yours to feel, they are valid and you owe explanation to no one why you feel and how you feel what you feel.
Your experience, your show, your art, your life.

Illusion – a tool or pure lie

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This I just saw on a social media platform:
‘What makes desirable to be desirable?
From that the woman without sparing money, time and effort, and often even enduring pain, tries to present her advantages in the most tempting way possible and to minimize her disadvantages.
Every single woman has disadvantages, but the man doesn’t have to know about it. Women know how to divert their attention from disadvantages.
Because men are never interested in the truth, it is not what makes them fever, but the illusion of what they see.
However, it is up to the woman, what kind of sight unfolds before them. The smart woman creates the illusion.’

NOOO, this is so fucking wrong on so many levels!

First of all, desirable is not like mathematics where 2+2 always equals 4.
What one considers desirable is a personal preference, meaning that is unique to each and every one of us.

Then why does it talk only about women?
Big mistake to believe men don’t want to be desirable! They do.

Of course, we all want to show our best on a first date or on a special occasion but to build, have and keep a relationship, honesty is a must.
And honesty means that we, women and men alike, admit to our disadvantages too.

Not to mention the fact that it is impossible to upkeep an ‘illusion’ – that I rather call a lie – without fail, all the time, 24/7.
Also, where would the person be in this act of illusion? I mean the authentic, real, raw truth of the person.
I tell you: nowhere! Would be hidden, or worse, not even discovered, acknowledged. It would be a kind of a freak show only.

Plus, it is insulting towards men.
‘Never interested in the truth’?!? How can anyone generalize men like that?
I mean sure, when one is after only a one-night stand, some sexual satisfaction then yes, I buy it, we don’t need the full truth, only the best of each other that makes that night a celebratory fireworks.
But then again, in such a case it would apply both to women AND men!

Worth a note too, men are not dumb, stupid, brainless dicks.
Feel sorry for you if this is the only kind you ever (in family, school, work, relationships, …) experienced.
Men have brain, and they use it too and so, after the initial hunger, they would see through such an ‘illusion’.
When they were after just sex, they likely wouldn’t mind but if they were to look for a relationship then it is also likely that they would get out and look elsewhere.
Obviously, here I am talking about mature men, not hungry boys.

As a final clarification, here is the official definition of the word, illusion:
– an instance of a wrong or misinterpreted perception of a sensory experience
– a deceptive appearance or impression
– a false idea or belief

So please, don’t fall for such shallow ‘wisdom of life’!
It is untrue, simplifying and is hurtful.
Use your brain, rely on your wisdom and be yourself! Fully!