Next Step for me

/in , , , , , /by

It was nearly 6 years ago when I started a Facebook page with the intension of sharing some of my thoughts to help to heal, chill, learn, move forward or just simply ‘saying out loud’ some thoughts that one couldn’t or wouldn’t do for her/himself.
Then a little over a year ago, as I had the privilege to work with more and more people through what I grew steadily and continuously both as a coach and as a person, I started this website to do the same in an ‘even more me’ environment and was shifting the emphasis to here.

As of today, I am ready for the next step.

Introducing my YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCxqlZbNISn405gY9nWY5vRg

The planned structure is that every week there will be a video or a blog post, alternately.
Every second week you will have something new to read here and on the week in between a new video will be aired on YouTube.

Hopefully, you will continue to find some positive encouragement in my content and when you get to the point, you will contact me to work together.

Thank you for your ongoing support, positive feedback and encouragement!

As always, I believe it to be true for all of us: the best is yet to come.

Celebrating another ‘day’

/in , , , , /by

… so today is International Women’s day, today women young and old are celebrated in the most part of the world …
Those women who on other days get mum-shamed, body shamed, abused verbally, mentally, physically, raped and then pointed finger at and said she asked for it … and so on.

There are other ‘precious’ days in the calendar too, like Valentine’s Day when lovers show their love to their partner through gifts and gestures and the day before and after keep cheating on them, keep degrading them, don’t appreciate them.

Or there is Father’s Day when those men get elevated onto a pedestal for their amazing fatherness. Only the day before and after they get ignored, criticised for how they hold their own child, get told off that they are the worst why they allow/accept this or that for/in their children.

And the list could go on but you get the idea.

We have plenty of celebrations, special days written in the calendar and to comply with societal expectations we do our best to show we do know those days, we do what is expected.
Just have a look at any of the social media sites. All are there and showing (off) their feelings and gifts.

By now I am sure you sense it, I am not the biggest fan of such ‘special days’.
In my world if you are in love then you love every day, if you have a mother/father and you think they are the best then you feel like that all year round, if you appreciate and respect women then you do that all day and every day … and if you are not then don’t be a joke to ‘play nice’ for that one day for the ‘colleagues/neighbours to see’.

As for me, I feel it sickening and hypocritical when I see all the dirt, nastiness, attacks, criticism flowing like an endless river only being (kind of) stopped for one day in the year to celebrate certain groups of people.
In my ideal world we would all be caring, loving and allowing.
We would stop constantly looking over the fence into other’s gardens and give them unsolicited advice, opinion.
Rather, we would look around way more in our own world, keep looking into our own mirror to keep working on getting a nicer, better reflection.

Just stop complying with those, often only imagined, societal expectations.
Be the genuine, authentic, kind and caring person who you really are (or aspiring to be) all year round, regardless of the special title of the day.

Celebrate if you want to and know that you don’t have to!

Take on the world

/in , , , , /by

Travelling – I believe is one of the best tools to learn about people, cultures, nature, life and to understand the ignorance and invalidity of those complete obnoxiously stupid ideas of racism, sexism, any -ism really.

Wherever you go will experience something new, different, exciting, breathtaking, annoying, illogical by your own standards.
You will come across good people as well as some who will annoy the crap out of you.
When it comes to service, the same applies.
Often will experience amazing, caring, thoughtful service even though will might be different to what you got used to back at your own Country.
There will be also those occasions when it simply will not be acceptable.

A bouquet of my personal, practical experiences:
– just because you use the same hotel chain, save yourself from the misconception to expect the same level of service.
It will be different on many levels, like cleanliness, communication, basic operating principles
– high ratings for a place on any site is not a guarantee you not getting disappointed. This however works the other way round too!
– clean has way more interpretations than I’d ever imagined
– kind and friendly does not equal professional
– professional is not necessarily kind and friendly
– when visiting an attraction at the ticketing point you might get offered upgrading options/plus services to buy.
Before agreeing to any of it, make sure it is offered in your language, otherwise you can end up paying a higher price for something you get to understand not one word of
– when having the chance, try local food but know, most certainly it will taste different to what you flavoured back at home in that ‘nationality’ restaurant
– when travelling by car, keep in mind that parking also has different interpretations.
From underground garage to parking spaces in front of the building, from valet parking to wherever you find place on the surrounding streets, from free of charge to paying nearly as much for it as for the room itself
– being in a so classified elegant, upscale bar doesn’t mean your drink will be served in a proper (classical, taught in respected vocational schools) manner, but rest assured it will be expensive.

All that and many more.

If you are an avid traveller, I am sure you have your own list.

My conclusion however, is keep on travelling whenever you have the opportunity to do so.
Keep widening your horizon, your understanding of the world.

Convinced I am, it will make our world a better place by the more open-minded, adventurous, compassionate, more understanding, easy-going, more loving people.

Be one of them.

Opposing a psychologist

/in , , , , /by

Just read an interview with a big name clinical psychologist, sexual psychologist.

For the first read I was like, woah, I really don’t agree with her.
Then had a chat about the piece with a friend of mine and for the sake of being precise in the discussion I kept re-reading the article. The more I read it, the more I was like NO, this is crap!!!
Sure she is highly trained and very experienced in her profession but by what I read, I wonder what kind of partner/s she have/had and how her sex life is … of course it is also possible that again is just a bad journalist who cut some stuff together and ‘sold’ it as an authentic interview.

Anyway … one of the statements were that a woman’s full body is an erogenous zone, but a man has only one of such area. Really?
In my work as well as outside work I had zillions of conversations with clients and friends out of which none would approve the above said.
Not to talk about the men I had sex with, I experienced with all of them that they had multiple areas where if they got played with, I got to see standing results. Also, there are parts of my body where no matter how much one would invest, would never get an erotic response out of me.

Another thing that got me screaming was that she said, couples need not to discuss everything honestly because she says ‘if one is honest then wants to prove her/his point and that is straight way to conflict. Also – she asks – what should be discussed? That what to do? That would be like a GPS.’

Now come on! First of all, being honest does not mean being right.
Being honest means this is what I think, this is what it means to me, this is how I see/feel/understand of whatever it is about.
Being honest means I don’t sugar-coat shit, I don’t do/say/take/accept anything just to please the other while I do not agree.
Being honest gives way to get to know the real person, the real feelings/needs/wants/expectations … and so it gives way to meaningful COMMUNICATION and not to conflict.

What should be discussed? Anything. Everything. Whatever.

And yes, when it comes to sex, do tell your partner your likes and dislikes, let her/him know what works for you. It does not mean sex will become dull since when you have a favourite destination to go to, even the GPS offers different roads that lead there. So is in sex. The final destination is likely a given but the way how you bring your partner there depends on your creativity, enthusiasm, love, care, patience, playfulness, and of course on your physical skills too.
So please, for your sake, for your relationships’ sake do communicate, communicate continuously and communicate honestly!

When in Rome …

/in , , , /by

Have you ever been to Italy? To Rome? No? Then you can’t have any idea what I am talking about.

Italy is a must. A 100% not to be left off of anyone’s bucket list.
The history, art, food, wine, style, the natural professionalism of the ‘dolce far niente’ …

For me Italy is a forever love.

Last year after the worst 6 months of my life I got to go to Rome.
From the airport I was driven to the accommodation. Already in the car, just a few short minutes into the ride a sense of life hit me.
After half a year for the first time suddenly I felt alive and with each minute, with each site my eyes were able to see I was more and more so.

Apart from the kinda obvious places one visits, I loved the tiny coffee shop right next door to our place, where we had our morning coffee, the small boutiques, shops, restaurants with amazing interior designs, the people who were easy to be around, smiling, ever so colourful.
We had no detailed plan for our stay, just walked and turned corners as our hearts turned us.

One day we sat (some just left after their meal so we had the chance) to the tiny terrace of a restaurant for lunch. A fun, pro waiter, Peppe appeared and helped us to pick some mouth watering dishes. Fish, pasta with truffle … everything was above expectation.

Then at one of the evenings we went for dinner to a place that was recommended by our host. In a bit shabby looking little street, hidden under a deep arch of a gateway is a restaurant that will have you from the moment you enter. It’s interior design is what woah-s you immediately, then the staff, then the artfully presented food offering a taste-orgy. Just unbelievable what an amazing dish was created from plain broccoli. Not to mention that the manager looks like one of those magazine picture perfect guys who is selling you the Dolce Vita 😉

When you get the chance, go, and when in Rome, do as the Romans do! 🙂
Enjoy life!

http://tiberinoroma.it/en/          https://www.vittorioroma.com/